Honk! Hey guys! H-honk! Look out, I’m shoppin’! Oh-Em-Gee! Are you driving through this shopping center too? That’s so crazy! Wanna run into Spencer’s Gifts or Lady Foot Locker or whatever hasn’t gone bankrupt by now?!
In this make good episode of STAB!, Jesse Jones welcomes hot rod guests Cory Barringer, Willie Travis and Melony Ford to share their reimaginings of SCISSORS, SEX, & CLUCK, nine haiku about a rampaging car driving through a mall, and their thoughts on Ray Chapman, Carl Mays, Fiddlesticks, William Wallace, Stockholm Syndrome, stage play bans, & Bill Clinton, erotic poems about getting a hair cut, the concept of time, & big toes, and the synopsis of made-up movies “Curvy Greet”, “Die Dysfunctional Box”, & “The Needless Tiger”.
Aa-OOGA! Isn’t that crazy?! I got one of those old timey horns at Brookstone! I sound like my great-great-grandpa! That’s CRAZY! Oh! I have GOT to get a picture with Santa before I leave, and then, like, mourn the death of an American institution!